Forgiveness is therapeutic. My Guru, Master Choa Kok Sui says,
“If somebody does something wrong to you, you have to forgive. It is a manifestation of Divine Love, Divine Mercy ad Divine Compassion”
Forgiveness gives us wings to fly; also to develop more and more one must not have any kind of burden. And forgiveness is the only way to unburden oneself.
But what if too much of forgiveness and the love flowing thereof is creating issues in your life and your life is turning topsy-turvy and all chaotic. What should be done then? Shall we not forgive; shall we not let love flow into our life to make it better with its divine energy? Forgiveness is a necessity for all those who live a conscious life, a life of meaning. My Master also said,
“Mercy and Forgiveness must be balanced by the necessity for Peace and Order.”
So, we must forgive, albeit internally. Many a times, it’s not necessary to show the person in the physical world that you have forgiven him/her. It means even if you have forgiven the person, you don’t need to be friends with. Maintain a decorum of good behaviour and peace in front but don’t go ahead to become close. Master Choa Kok Sui also said,
“Sometimes it is time to say “Enough!” It is time to change. Sometimes we must say “Stop!”
For inner peace and for security and protection we must move ahead with only inner forgiveness. It means we forgive the person internally always but move ahead in life, not making the person part of life anymore.
The question now remains, to whom it shall be done. The gap to inner and outer forgiveness is for all those whose acts and deeds are hurting and still they don’t understand or contemplate themselves. For example a person who is in a partnership with another person is always cheating on various grounds. This person should be forgiven internally but all ties with him/her on business front should be severed.
From my personal experience I can say that there are many people who take the meaning of forgiveness in another way. If you show outer forgiveness and mingle with them then, they never realize their wrong doing. People like these never see their mistakes, what they are interested is, in finding faults at others. So, they don’t contemplate and never realize their mistakes. Not everybody has crossed the higher classes in this school of earth and so are child still. So, expecting them to act with higher wisdom and compassion is futile.
I do believe in Outer forgiveness, and I feel that for some time the relationship should be maintained, thus, giving the person in question time to understand one’s mistake. What I do is, if somebody hurts me, I forgive then and there; and give the person some time to come around and realize the mistakes. For some I have had provided some days, some months and some years. Although the list of people who have hurt me or my family, is very small, I have adhered to the time limits always.
When you see that the person whom you are forgiving is repeating the same mistakes again and again and is sending psychic attacks with negative thoughts and many a times repeat the same old negative actions against you, then it’s the time to say goodbye.
When you don’t give space to this person in your life anymore, make sure that you still are forgiving the person till the time your forgiveness is complete.
Forgiveness peels off layers of karma. And we must remember that the person who have had hurt us is coming from our previous karma. So, let the karma go away the same way as the person goes away from your life, through inner forgiveness only.
Maintaining the balance of inner and outer forgiveness is difficult at times. When you love a person unconditionally and you see the person is trying to ruin your life or is hurting you in different ways, you feel heartbroken. But remembering the law of karma; forgive the person and let the person go away from your life.
From my experience I can say that deciding when to act, on inner forgiveness only; is tough. It depends on how much important the relationship is. But, if one has to decide, one has to!!!!! While inner forgiveness deals with love, compassion, peace and happiness; outer forgiveness deals mainly with peace, justice and balance.
The other aspect of this situation may be that when we need to withdraw outer forgiveness that is when we need to sever all ties, and maintain a distance from people; and we don’t do it, then we give the other person more leverage. The person thus, acts in wrongful ways or indulges in sinful deeds and thus, we in a way get entwined with their karma.
But actually, this outer severity that we maintain with inner forgiveness becomes more of an act of compassion.
So, analyze all aspect of the situation and the person involved, work with inner forgiveness, decide on outer forgiveness and stick to your decision!!!!!
Have a blessed life, always………